I don’t know how to handle you anymore. 

You’ve changed. Yeah we’re sober and all is supposed to be good, right? I just don’t feel like it is. Today we replaspsed. It was your idea. I went along with it as usual because all I want is you to be happy. I’m starting to feel like this relationship is solely me bending over backwards to make you happy and me getting shat on when it’s me that needs something. Every ounce of energy and resources I have go into you. 

How does one talk about these things to someone who is only concerned with themselves eighty percent of the time. You tell me you’re worried I’ll get tired of you and leave and yet you don’t ever show me my feelings matter. You ignore me to argue with people you don’t know on Facebook, I’m lashed out on when I stand up for myself. I’m put down when I feel wronged. 

My brain is so fucked over the last two years and I have no clue how to talk to you about it because you’re not responsive to it. 

I’ve never wanted something to work so bad that I’m willing to be blinded by the things that are wrong. 

Forgive me for my whining.. I might just snap today if I don’t put it somewhere. I have one place you can’t invade my thoughts and turn them around on me but appearently that’s wrong too. 

I give up. 

Relationships suck. Life is hard. And we all have problems. 

May you all have a good night. I can’t even finish my thought because I can see you’re about to ask ” who you talking to, what’s that? Let me read.” I deserve privacy too. 


I wish I had someone to talk to. 

My friend does things that irk me beyond no end. Stupid little things that seem controlling. I’m over it. Everytime we get close to fixing things she pulls some shit. And heaven forbid I mention it. When she’s in the wrong she finds a way to snap it to me real quick. I just wanna feel like my voice matters. I’d love to have someone to tell me I’m not crazy for my feelings.